In the previous post, I discussed the problem of inviting hurt into our lives by dwelling on injuries of the past. It really shouldn't be any surprise that feeding that flame of resentment is toxic. It steals our joy from us, prevents us from pursing our nature, and renews the victimization we once suffered.
Other reflections are for the purpose of ignoring certain realities. The Watchtower Society spends inordinate amounts of time and column inches extolling the virtues of meditation. Constant reflection on God's word, and the extra-biblical publications distributed by Witnesses, are the only way to prevent consumption by this wicked system. Why, it's best to start the day with spiritual reflection, and on your coffee break. May as well bring the iPad in the can with you so you have something wholesome to read while you do something unclean.
These practices serve as blinders. Their sole, and very effective, purpose is to completely occupy one's time so that critical thought is a practical impossibility. There just isn't time to examine anything else.
For one reason or another, we all went searching for more information. For my part, I was simply lazy and didn't care about the Society in my twenties. I was content to be unplugged from the constant reminder that I was sinful and inadequate. It wasn't yet important to me to really validate what I knew or didn't know about the Society. That would come later.
All I could be bothered with at the time was avoiding discussions about my past as a Witness and, with far more determination, preventing a future as a Witness. Even hearing the word "witness" from the television caused me substantial anxiety. I wish that was a joke. It's this particular trigger word that has largely prevented me from enjoying crime dramas.
It took time to learn to think again. The once pervasive reminders I endured of Christian thinking were harder to slough off than I'd like to admit. Keywords, like the one above, practiced responses, patterns of speech... all of it had to be unlearned. Oddly, defending other religions was even a practice I had learned. It was ingrained in me to defend the right to believe, even if it was a contending faith. Thus, when the documentary Going Clear debuted on HBO, I was hesitant to watch. But I did.
By the end of it, I was shaking with fury over the undeniable similarities shared between Scientologists and Jehovah's Witnesses. No, we're not talking about anything so trite as a religious belief. We're talking about the hierarchy of their organization, their own jargon, prevention of free thought, and expulsion of apostates. In either case, you could transplant the beliefs of one into the organizational structure of the other and still have a functional tax shelter.
Here's the thing that really only starts to make sense when you've been away from it for a while. Witnesses could be asked to compare their beliefs and practices with Scientology, and I'm certain that they would almost unanimously agree that there were no comparisons to be had. What they would say Scientology does is to pervert faith and belief. But what they would say Witnesses do is to protect their Christian brotherhood. In actuality, the only differences between the two are the jargon they use to embody the philosophies of these practices.
SEAORG, for example, is the equivalent of Bethel. Both encompass the managerial departments and personnel of daily operations, including Ecclesiastical development. Members of both are permitted to marry, but must resign if they wish to have children. Both work unusually long hours in performance of their duties. Both are given small allowances for basic needs. Both are provided room and board as part of their service. These are functionally the same entities under different names.
What Witnesses call "apostates", Scientology calls "suppressive persons". These people are shunned by other members of the church; often losing contact with faithful family members, and enduring legal battles to maintain custody or contact with minor children.
Dissenting thought is not permitted. Openly questioning the teaching of the church is not permitted. There is no transparency above the level or position a person occupies in the church at any given time. There is no financial accountability.
But as long as one persists in the cycle of reinforcement, none of these glaring issues is worth examining. They are casually dismissed, explained away, or ignored wholesale. It is the goal of this indoctrination to make followers so incredulous of the outside world that any challenge is avoided. Watchtower has become very good at this. Very good. So good, in fact, that followers must often resort to semantics to differentiate themselves from "false religion".
For example, Witnesses do not "shun". They "disfellowship". Disfellowshipping is the prohibition of contact with rebellious, unrepentant sinners. Thus, the disfellowshipped person is not allowed to pollute the spirituality of obedient members of the church. Now if that sounds a lot like shunning, don't be alarmed. Except for being exactly alike in practice, they have nothing in common.
See? Semantics.
The cycle is one of denial. Denial of understanding. Denial of truth. Denial of reality. For as long as a person commits themselves to that cycle, there is no opportunity for growth.
Damn. To be honest, I wish I could go back to the start of my life and hit the reset button. Who knows what kind of person I could be now if I hadn't been strapped on that merry-go-round so early in my life.
I've got no clever turn of phrase to express that...